October 9, 2002
       The Winner!       

Last Meeting:
       The Scouts worked on their old fashioned tents for most of the meeting and followed up with a knot relay before closing.  The Wolverines won the competition earning a tally for the Patrol Competition.  Let me say that again:  The W-O-L-V-E-R-I-N-E-S won the knot relay.  What is wrong with this picture?  I was personally asked by older scouts, who will remain anonymous (Brent H, David S, Austin W), how to tie two half hitches and a clove hitch.  Now, I know I'm no expert on knots myself, but this is really embarrassing.  So, here is the list of knots half of us apparently don't know:    Clove hitch
             Timber hitch
             Two Half hitches
             Square knot
             Taut-Line hitch
             Bowline
             Sheet Bend. 
       All the scouts in the troop should be practicing these.  Now, I know you're thinking, "Yeah right, like I'm going to practice tying knots instead of playing video games," so we're going to make you in a way. :) (See the Scout Trivia Section for details

Next Meeting:
       The scouts will be working on their menus for the camporee.  Each scout attending the camporee needs to bring $13 in cash for food.  Also, the popcorn sale ends next week, so all scouts must bring in their popcorn order forms.

Popcorn:
     $8,625 is about half of $15,000.  Yet, all the troop needs from you is $150.  Period.  In all honesty, $150 is not that much money as far as popcorn goes, just ask Justin C.  For the third week in a row he alone has outsold every other scout in the troop.  How does he do it?  Sulking in despair, that is the question I gave Justin after the meeting.  "After all," I thought, "I am yet to sell $150 worth myself, so how am I going to do it in one week?!"  Most of you are familiar with this feeling.  So how does he do it?  Time and commitment.  Justin reported that he sells for an average of three hours every few days.  He visits big neighborhoods, not just in his area, but in Greenville as well.

       The boy is a machine.  His gross total is over 2,000 but this reporter doubts he'll stop there.  Justin also recommends smiling, looking cute, not walking on lawns, and  "Not getting angry when someone doesn't buy some, because then they never will buy any from any scout."  Indeed, this miniature-popcorn-selling-fiend is both cheerful
and kind when he approaches the door of a customer.  Obviously, it works;  time and courtesy are what pays the bills for this young entrepreneur.  "If you take the time, you get the prizes," he says, adding, "It's worth it."

       So, what can we, the scouts of Troop 159 do? Be just like Justin and Chase (the other superior salesman, also of a petite stature).  I don't recommend chopping off your legs or wearing masks of cute little 12 year olds.  However, I do recommend sending your popcorn form with your parents to work, taking your list to your teachers at school, and, if you haven't already, calling relatives and neighbors.  Remember: smile, suck up, use every trick in the book, and leave saying, "I'll see you next year, then!"

Calendar:
       October 12- OA Fall Fellowship
       October 16- Troop Meeting (Personal Management meets at 6:00)
       October 18-20- Fall Camporee
       October 23- Troop Meeting

Scout Announcements:

       SELL POPCORN LIKE THERE IS NO TOMORROW!

       Pumpkins:     Scouts in need of service hours may attend a pumpkin-loading session on Main Street, Greenville this Saturday from 8am to 9am.  For details and directions contact Mr. Warlick.

Adult Announcements:
       Any Adult who would like to act as an Assistant Scoutmaster at the next Scout Jamboree should see Mr. Warlick for an application form.

Jokes of the Week:
       Guys, I am impressed.  I received so many jokes this past week I had to sort through them (poor me) to find some worth publishing...  Anyway, here they are:

1. This joke was found in England to be the funniest joke in the world.  Then again, what do the British know about humor?....
                "Two men are hiking in a Forrest when one man falls over dead from a heart attack.  The other hiker immediately calls a doctor on his cell phone.  'He just grabbed at his chest and then fell to the ground, I think he's dead!' said the man, 'What should I do?' 'Well,' replied the doctor, 'the first thing you should do is make sure he's dead.'  The man puts down the phone and the sound of a shotgun is heard through the receiver.  The man then picks up the phone and says, 'OK, now what?' "      
2. I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and think, 'Well, that's not going to happen.' 
3. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
4. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
5. How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
6. If a chronic liar tells you he is a chronic liar do you believe him?
7. If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
8. You know how most packages say "Open here" What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else?"
9. We all know that "vegetarian" means not eating meat, but it's actually an Indian word meaning "lousy hunter".
10. What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?
    

Questions? Comments?   KEEP THEM TO YOURSELF!!!
  Just kidding, send them to me, press the "reply" button, or talk to me at the meeting.